Code: Mercy

This event occurred just a few days ago as I was preparing to leave the school premises. As I glanced through the glass door, I was taken aback to see a familiar face staring back at me with his piercing blue eyes. Despite the cold of the winter night, Dom was dressed only in a T-shirt and sweatpants, holding a box of clothes in his hands as he made his way towards the school building.

Intrigued, I glanced down at my watch: 10:49 PM. What was he doing here at this hour? I thought.

With a mixture of shock and concern, I confronted him as he stood outside the glass door. "Students are strictly forbidden to be in the school building after hours," I reminded him.

"Miss, can you let me in, please?" he pleaded.

"Absolutely not! What are you trying to do in the dead of night?" I retorted firmly, refusing to open the door as I stood with my arms crossed. We engaged in a silent standoff until he eventually relented, setting down the box and entering the building after punching in the code.

I watched in disbelief. No student should have access to the passcode for the school building.

"Who gave you the code?" I demanded to know.

"The lady who lives here. She said I could come and use the dryer since the one in our house is broken," he explained.

Our school rented the building from a local church whose pastor had a strong commitment to the community, particularly to those in need. Although I didn't know the family personally, I was aware that they lived in one of the rooms in the building with the pastor's permission.

The following day, I promptly reported the incident to the principal, emphasizing the importance of student safety and the school's liability. The safety of our students was paramount in my mind, especially considering the troubling news reports about grooming. Without knowing these individuals, I couldn't trust them to be around our students, especially late at night.

Later that day, while I was heading to lunch, a student approached me with a somber expression when he delivered this surprising news:

“Miss, why would you report Dom for coming to the school? He’s been expelled." 

I was stunned by this revelation. While I understood that there could be repercussions for his actions, I never anticipated it to escalate to expulsion.

Confusion clouded my thoughts as I struggled to comprehend the situation, and this prompted me to seek clarification from a school administrator as the severity of the punishment seemed disproportionate. 

"He was given numerous chances before but repeatedly disregarded the rules. Allowing him to remain poses a liability… What if other students followed his example? What if he got injured and no one found him until morning, or worse—what if someone dies in this building due to our negligence?"

His reasoning struck a chord with me.

Despite protests from some students against the perceived “injustice,” the decision to expel him was final. His sense of superiority led him to defy authority and ignore the rules, which ultimately landed him in this situation. 

As teachers and students rallied to advocate for him, I couldn't help but question if another chance should be given. Despite the counseling and mentoring efforts, he remained obstinate. His refusal to yield to authority became the tipping point.

I pondered the fine line between mercy and enabling. How could we demonstrate God's love and grace in such situations? I reflected on what Jesus would do and where His mercy would extend. 

The story that immediately came to mind was that of King Manasseh in the Bible, albeit an extreme example. It seems unfair that despite his atrocities during his fifty-five-year reign—sacrificing children, practicing witchcraft, persecuting God's people—he found redemption in the end. Why would God reward him with goodness despite his lifetime of wickedness?

What about the lives he took? The children he sacrificed? The grief he caused?

Where was justice in all of this?

Why would he still be granted a place in heaven after all the evil he committed?

Growing up with a strong sense of justice and equality, I aspired to make the world a better place by studying law. I aimed to battle injustice—one case at a time. During my legal studies, I studied about injustice within the legal system. I remembered delving into notorious cases of innocent men, such as the Guildford Four, being wrongfully convicted. Swiftly after their arrest, the four underwent intense police interrogation, enduring intimidation, threats, torture, and deprivation of basic needs, which coerced them into false confessions and led to lengthy prison sentences for crimes they did not commit. Despite clear wrongdoing by the police, as they even went to the lengths of fabricating evidence against these innocent individuals, they faced no repercussions from the Crown Protective Services.

I likened the story of King Manasseh to the policemen who coerced false confessions from the Guildford Four—how they continued to live freely despite their actions. Although King Manasseh committed far more atrocities, it appeared that he faced no consequences during his fifty-five-year reign until he was taken captive to Babylon. I imagined the terror, fright, and helplessness of the people living under his rule as he persecuted them, even resorting to the mass genocide of infants as he ripped the babies from their mothers’ arms, throwing them into the fire for his own pleasure. 

If there were a definition of pure evil, King Manasseh would embody it. 

While I've never personally encountered anyone like King Manasseh, I have experienced injustices, including some that originated within the church. I've heard stories of religious leaders who have caused significant harm within their religious communities yet have remained in positions of authority, such as pastors or elders. I've struggled to understand how the church leadership could permit such individuals to continue representing God in their roles.

"Min, even the worst people often remain in ministry for a long time," Mrs. Em shared with me, recounting her own life story.

As she spoke, my heart ached for her. She revealed that her ex-husband was a troubled and physically abusive man. Despite her suffering, she felt trapped due to financial constraints and their shared children. What compounded her pain was the lack of support from the church community during her divorce. Instead of believing her and offering help, they sided with her abusive ex-husband and accused her of fabricating stories.

"Why would you accuse him of such things? He's such an upright man..." they would say.

"You need to reconcile with him and apologize. He's such a godly person," they insisted.

But Mrs. Em knew the truth of what happened behind closed doors. Beneath her blouse and Sabbath-clad skirts, she bore the physical scars inflicted by her husband. His abuse not only harmed her physically but also posed a threat to her spiritual well-being. It was disheartening to see how easily he had deceived the church community with his charm and false facade.

I couldn't help but wonder why God didn't remove such a man from His service, knowing the harm he could cause to others and potentially weaken their faith.

"How were you able to forgive him? He was such a terrible person!" I asked Mrs. Em.

"It wasn't by my own strength, but by the strength that Jesus gave me," she replied.

Despite the injustice she faced and the pain she endured, Mrs. Em remained faithful to God and continued to serve as a prayer warrior in the church. Her resilience and unwavering faith were truly admirable.

"... Besides, we have all fallen short of the glory of God. If we seek God's forgiveness for all that we have done, we must also forgive others, no matter how difficult it may be," she explained.

“Perhaps we need to view others through the same lens of grace and forgiveness that Jesus extends to us.”

It was a powerful revelation that shifted my perspective.

Although justice was delayed for King Manasseh and warnings about judgment went unheeded by him and the entire nation, I imagine that those he persecuted, including the prophet Isaiah, whom he sawed in half mercilessly, would never expect to see him in heaven.

Indeed, despite his extensive period of wickedness and evil, God offered him an opportunity for redemption. Towards the end of his life, judgment befell him as he faced captivity due to his willful ignorance of God's warnings delivered through contemporary prophets. In his lowest state, God met him there with mercy.

I reflected upon my flawed sense of justice, which often lacks compassion and love compared to God's justice, which embodies love, patience, kindness, and mercy. From my perspective, I desired justice to befall those who hurt me and caused my students' spiritual decline. I longed for God's wrath to reign over their lives.

Yet, just like what Mrs. Em relayed, we have all sinned and fallen short of God's glory. Despite my countless past transgressions, God showed me kindness and mercy, giving me opportunities to repent and turn back to Him. In my wavering walk with God, I stumble and fall, yet His mercy sustains me.

I never imagined myself as a blog writer for a ministry as I feel unworthy of sharing my story amid my weakened spiritual journey. Yet, in His mercy, God still uses me to serve Him.

Through this Biblical story, I've gained a profound insight into God’s mercy and justice. Initially, I believed that King Manasseh faced no consequences until his final moments. However, upon delving into his narrative, I discovered that it was during his time of judgment that he found God. Similar to the prodigal son, who repented and returned to his father when he hit rock bottom—King Manasseh, as a captive after reigning since he was twelve, turned his heart to God, seeking forgiveness and desiring to change his nation when he was at his lowest—albeit too late to reverse the damage he had caused. 

This realization has profoundly shaped my approach as an educator. While it's crucial to offer mercy whenever possible, there comes a point when warnings and opportunities for change have been exhausted. In situations where a student's actions pose more harm than good to the school community, while justice may be necessary, we can still demonstrate mercy and reflect the love of God. Our ultimate goal is to lead them to experience and embrace Jesus' love through our actions. Shifting my perspective towards challenging students, I recognize that their hardened hearts may be due to a lack of experiencing God's persistent, enduring love in their lives. Yet, God embraces them into His kingdom with His code: Mercy, and it is my goal to extend the same mercy towards them, recognizing that it is only through this code that I, too, am welcomed into His kingdom.